It's been two days, and I am dying. I'm sure any person going through a breakup can relate to me and my feelings. I look back to everything we had together, everything we did together, everything we went through together and to think it's all gone, is too much to understand. I hate when night comes around, I sleep and all I dream is him saying "babe I love you" with that cute face I love so much and those kisses I adore! Then I wake up...and realize it's just a dream. Now the thing is I don't hate him, I don't have a grudge or anything because I know he loves me. The one thing I can't seem to get through my head is, why did he give up on me. I know and admit there was things he didn't like; my jealousy, my insecurity. But if he loved me so much why just give up? He knew he was all I had left and all I was looking forward to in life. Now many people say you're only 18 you're young don't get stuck with ONE guy. Well here's my response to all that. No matter what age you are, when you fall IN love, it will be the same exact feeling as a 30 year old. When that person you're IN love with walks away, that hurt will be the same from a 35 year old. And I mean really really in love. Not a couple weeks and "oh babe i love you i want to be with you the rest of my life" NO! I mean when you really get to know that person, when you get to know their flaws and still love everything about them. When you do all you can to make your relationship happy. And lets be realistic, EVERY couple fights. There is not ONE couple that has not gotten into an argument. But that love should be the one keeping everything strong and worth it. Keep people and their comments away. Don't get me wrong, advice is good but only to a certain extent. I'm just so lost right now, i would do anything to be back in his arms, i would do anything to hug him and never let go, to kiss his face and hear him be chipilon again. I know my desires are different from his though and I must admit, it really really hurts. Time to blame myself, I know it wasn't ALL MY fault that it's over but I know part of it is. My insecurity and jealousy drove him out the door and i admit it. I regret it. I know and believe deep down that he didn't cheat or anything, but when it was at the moment i found something that bothered me i would go overboard. I've let all that go, all i want is him. But let's get this through my head and heart....He's not coming back. MOVE ON!
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